Tired

10/8/18

Last night Weston woke me up around 1:30.  He ended up puking 3 times in the toilet.  I was grateful for strength to take care of him and clean up.  I got him set up on the couch and went back to bed.  He woke up again around 5:30 with intense cramping and diarrhea.  

It was also the very first night Rafe slept the whole night.  I am grateful he did so I could take better care of Weston but I can't help but shake my head.  

I felt tired and weary today.  This stage of life is so draining.  Rafe wants to be held the majority of the time he is awake.  There are countless things that need done every day.  

I look in the mirror and I can see how I have aged.  I see the start of wrinkles and dark circles.  I just look exhausted. 

As the day has come to a close I am grateful for the moments I spent cherishing my family.  The hugs, kisses, encouragement and care.  It brings me fulfillment and joy at the end of the day knowing I loved them and took care of them today. I am grateful for the moments I didn't lose my temper but pressed on.  

I am grateful Weston puked in the toilet and not all over his bed or on the carpet.  

I am grateful for Dane checking the tires on the van, fixing the dryer and for his hug each day when he wakes up.

I feel like I am learning and making progress as a mother.

I feel like I need to focus on the good they do more and give less attention to the unwanted behavior.  I was reminded that Weston needs quality time and attention and lots of positive reinforcements. 

I am grateful for our new home.  I love having more space.  I love having a master room and bathroom.  I love the cozy basement with the fireplace. I love that the kids can play downstairs and that the upstairs can be quieter. 

I hope Westons sickness is just from something he ate and not a horrible stomach bug that we will all get.